Wasting

Suddenly, I found myself wasting words once again. It's not that I don't have a choice or anything. I have a choice. We all have a choice. It's just that at this moment, eating my pride for something is the best thing I've got.

I started writing for them again. Giving away words that could've mattered to some other people. I left them because I can't seem to stomach the rotten system of a frog-woman that never seem to realize that she's dumb. Well, ladies and gentlemen, she is dumb. I am not being mean here, I am just telling the truth. If there is one person in this world that I could probably slap hard in the face then tell how dumb she is, it would be her. She's two-faced and everybody hates her. But well, I have to do this. I need the small amount of money they could give me in exchange of my words for something I have been saving up for. I really don't know till when I can do this, till when I can stomach throwing away words like it didn't matter to me. This would be temporary and for as long as I don't get to see her face or talk to her ever again, it's more than fine.

Cheers to 2012!

It's the New Year. It's 2012 already but unlike everybody celebrating this once a year event, I spent it like an ordinary day. I watched the beautiful pyro display by my window and felt nothing. Maybe, this is just what happens when you have dealt with so much pain in the past year. The start of a new year of hope appeared to be just another day. Just another night.


I found myself reading a book while listening to all people having fun outside. They are all excited. They are all looking forward to this year. But I am a skeptic. What if this year turns out to be like my 2011? What if I get more disappointed this year? What if I fail much more than I should have? What if I decide to take my own life again? But then again, I know what you're thinking, "What if not?" Ah, yes. What if none of these negativity happens? What if 2012 will be fruitful after all? What if I am just overthinking again? What if this is really a time to shine and I have to do something about it?


Well, maybe I just have to figure it out for the next days. I have 365 days left. 365 days to explore. 365 days to conquer. Live long and prosper, humans! Cheers to 2012!